Relationships are the cornerstone of our existence. They give us joy, meaning, and are the spaces where we grow most profoundly. When we talk about an “abundant relationship”, we’re delving into a connection where both partners feel enriched, fulfilled, and deeply understood.
Relationships aren’t just about longevity but the quality of time spent together, and the depth of connection. Having had my fair share of sup par and even abusive relationships, I spent years uncovering what it takes to build a happy, healthy relationship that thrives.
So, in this blog we’ll talk about how to cultivate a rich co-creative relationship where both partners can find ultimate satisfaction, more joy and greater intimacy.
Table Of Contents
- The Essence of Abundance in Relationships
- Understanding and Aligning Intentions
- Recognizing and Communicating Desires
- Setting and Prioritizing Your Relationship
- The Role of Boundaries in Abundant Relationships
- Challenges and How to Overcome Them
- Celebrating Abundance: The Joys of a Deep Connection
The Essence of Abundance in Relationships
Abundance, in its core, is about more than just having plenty; it’s about appreciating, cherishing, and nurturing. In relationships, an abundance mindset is the opposite of a scarcity mindset. Where scarcity may breed jealousy, doubt, and fear, abundance brings forth trust, deep understanding, and mutual respect. It’s the belief that love isn’t finite but grows with shared experiences and mutual effort.
When my husband and I first met, I was coming into the relationship as a widow, and he a divorcee. Because our entry points were so vastly different I was forced to try to see through his lens and he mine. It wasn’t easy at first and we both made it more difficult for the other many times over. But once we understood that appreciating each others past was vital to our success we started to carve the path to abundance together.
Understanding and Aligning Intentions
To have an abundant relationships, you and your partner have to have common intentions. Most people overlook intentions as part of a flourishing relationship but they are the rudder of the relationship ship. It’s the direction, the “why” behind the journey you’re embarking on together. Whether it’s to grow old together, build a family, or explore the world hand-in-hand, shared visions are vital.
While I’m not a huge fan of talking a relationship to death, one of the harder lessons I’ve learned about relationships is that if you don’t discuss common intentions you might be in the relationship for different reasons. And, if each parter is working toward something apart from the other, the relationship will eventually be torn apart. And that can be painful.
Having open dialogue about want to co-create together Is a great way to determine if you’re both on the same playing field. And, it can save you a lot of heartbreak as well.
Here are some practical steps you and your partner can use to align intentions:
- Open dialogue: Discuss long-term goals, aspirations, and dreams from the get go.
- Visualize together: Create a shared vision board or a list of relationship milestones – this isn’t mine and my husband’s thing but it’s worked for many of my clients.
- Review: As life changes, so might intentions. Yearly review to ensure you’re still on the same page can prevent a lot of confusion.
Recognizing and Communicating Desires
Desires can be seen as the winds that might divert or speed up the relationship ship. They’re dynamic, changing, and deeply personal. While intentions can be mutual from the start, desires might differ, and that’s okay. What matters is awareness and communication.
Self-awareness is key. Before communicating, take time to understand your own desires. Is it more quality time you seek? Or perhaps more shared activities? Maybe more intimacy or creativity in the bedroom?
For me, playing in the bedroom has always been important. More than just getting off, it’s the way I connect to my partners unconditionally. But I haven’t always been able to explain it clearly. Clarity came when I learned how to become increasingly self-aware along my healing journey.
Prior to being able to express this need clearly, my previous partners couldn’t understand or honor it. But since I’ve been remarried, and able to communicate my desires, my husband is available for me in ways no one has ever been before.
Effective communication is about understanding, and it requires practice. When couples don’t practice communication they end up ignoring one another’s desires. Or worse, they play a blame game that breaks apart what could otherwise be a deeply loving, abundant relationship.
When communicating use “I” statements such as I need, I desire, I understand. Allow your partner to do the same. And if both of you strive to understand before being understood, your relationship will flourish with abundance.
Setting and Prioritizing Your Relationship
Life can be chaotic. Amidst work, family, and personal goals, it’s easy for a relationship to unintentionally take the back seat. That’s why setting relationship priorities is so important.
Combining families with my husband was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Even though we were crazy in love with each other, we couldn’t get the co-parenting and coexisting as one family right for a long time. And, that’s why we prioritized our alone time together and apart.
Prioritizing your relationship sometimes means having time apart to do work on yourself and enjoy the things that your partner doesn’t necessarily like doing. For instance, my husband loves to hang out with his buddies but I’m not very social as a result of serious relationship trauma.
Even though I am mostly healed, I still prefer to spend a lot of time alone working on things my husband has no interest in like learning astrology, exploring occult sciences, and shopping in metaphysical stores. So I let him play corn hole, drink beer, or fly out west to hike with his buddies while he honors what I love to do as well.
This makes our shared time together significantly more meaningful, exciting, intimate and abundant.
Here are a few ways to prioritize your realtionship.
- Schedule quality time together and apart:
- Check-in daily: A simple “How was your day?” or, “Can I do anything for you, Babe?” can make a huge the difference because it sends a vibe to your partner alerting them you’re with them even when life moves too fast.
- Kiss and hug: Little pecks on the lips and a 5 second embrace throughout the day is everything. The energetic exchange that occurs when we engage physically is healing on all levels. Plus, it reminds your partner how much you love them without having to say a word.
The Role of Boundaries in Abundant Relationships
Boundaries are often misunderstood. They’re not walls or barriers but guidelines that help partners understand each other’s limits and comfort zones.
The power of saying “no” isn’t about rejection but clarity. For instance, if one partner isn’t comfortable with the other sharing personal details with friends, it should be communicated and respected.
If one partner suddenly can’t handle a workload they are normally responsible for – it should be communicated and respected.
The more you clearly define the zone you are going to thrive in for your partner, and your partner defines their zone, the more the relationship will thrive.
Challenges and How to Overcome Them
No relationship is without its storms. Misunderstandings, external pressures, or personal traumas can cause rifts. However, challenges aren’t necessarily destructive; they can be constructive if approached correctly.
The first tip I can give you is to either learn how to have healthy debates, don’t argue. And if the debate turns into an argument, agree to let it go at least temporarily. There is no room for fighting in an abundance of love. Strive to honor each others perspective don’t strive for victory.
The second tip is to seek help when you need it. Sometimes, a neutral third party, like a therapist, coach, or a counselor, can provide invaluable perspectives. You can engage together or separately find a support system that will help you be more mindful and neutral in the midst of challenges.
And, finally, remember the love: During hard times, revisit memories, letters, or anything that reminds you of your bond.
Celebrating Abundance: The Joys of a Deep Connection
An abundant relationship is a joyous one. Think of the quiet moments when a simple glance shared more than words ever could. Or the triumphant moments when you overcame challenges hand-in-hand. These are the markers of a deep, thriving connection.
Celebrating abundance isn’t just about grand gestures but daily appreciations. It’s the morning coffee made just right, the supportive hug after a hard day, or the laughter shared over an inside joke.
Being grateful for the positive aspects of your relationship is the best way to grow those aspects.
Cultivating an abundant relationship isn’t a one-time effort but a lifelong journey. With every aligned intention, every shared desire, and every upheld priority, the relationship deepens and becomes more resilient. Abundance is not just about having plenty but in finding richness in every shared moment, every challenge overcome, and every joy celebrated.